MOST mornings when I am driving to work, I have to wait for someone to let me out into the road. I never have to wait long. Simple acts of kindness like this oil the wheels of our everyday life and make it tolerable: a smile; a kind word; adding a personal greeting to emails. If you then add on to this the support of those closest to us, our friends and family, it seems clear that it is love (not money!) that makes the world go around.

Love is a central message of most of the main religions. So why, after thousands of years, are we not more generous and tolerant, both individually and collectively? Why is it so hard to put kindness into practice?

Trying to love more, to be more often kind is not easy. I find a thousand small incidents that annoy me and some people whom I simply do not like. Trying to use sheer will power, to force myself doesn't work for me. I don't have that kind of will power and resent being bullied, even by myself. So how can we achieve this?

I think we need to start by being kind to ourselves, to be more understanding and tolerant of ourselves. It is possible, of course, to take this too far and become self-indulgent, but I know far more people who are too harsh with themselves. And how is it possible to be harsh with yourself and then gentle to others?

Recognising and accepting our own weaknesses will not instantly change us into better people but it may move us more often to a place where kind and loving actions become as natural as breathing.

Kevin Hogan

Skipton Quaker Meeting